merry crimbo folks

Merry Christmas all, 

In the background, the boys are cooking up a nut loaf vegetarian roast Christmas dinner, I have a berry pie in the oven and am going to whip Nutella cream, there are root vegies roasting, whisky and egg nog in our glasses - all is well. It is strange to be away from my dear family and friends for this day of celebration and merriment, I missed you all more when I woke this morning, but creating our own little Christmas was fun and sweet. 

Lovely wishes to everyone, I hope your days were filled with beautiful people, connection, reflection and generosity. Much love, Caitlin xx

christmas is 'a comin

There's something about fields of waist-deep powder, decorating log cabins with thick icing, deforming shapes into Doctor Seuss landscapes - it just feels Christmassy. Hearing the soft woof of drifts falling from the eaves, boots sinking past their cuffs in snow, darkness falling at 4.30pm. Today, a home day, just two days shy of Christmas, I spent the morning elving, cleaning, creating a wreath and baking barefoot in the cosy kitchen, listening to the croonings carols of Frank Sinatra and Bing Crosby. Cloves on the radiator, baked banana muffins and the tree make the house smell wonderful. This is my favourite time of year. 

musings...

sometimes I feel lost in my own head, I haven't yet learned to tame the thoughts making devlish merry in my mind. I tend to find myself drowning in waves of emotionally charged thoughts and start finding things to blame and fault. I guess it's just a human trait.
In these moments, which have been a little too frequent lately, I try to remember what it is that i feel best doing, I remind myself what an amazing place I'm in and that I have lovely folks surrounding me.
Once I take the time to ground myself, It's as if my 'real' self is laughing, saying 'what on earth were you fretting about?' but then a few hours later I feel the same again.
I am so lucky, writing it down helps me to remember that, but this trip has thrown me headlong into a new world, a new whirl. I suddenly have to be a sole person, alone at times, managing my life all by myself. And it has been much easier than I thought, but sometimes I forget that I'm still little 19 year old me and I can let myself feel vulnerable sometimes.

I don't need to remind myself how lucky and supported I am, but I am allowed to have days of missing home, friends, family, boyfriend, house, bed, chickens, dog, neighbours, smells of gum trees.

Just writing these words has alleviated all my down feelings.
Also a little trip back to the start of my blog was just lovely, memories of blissful Irish times.


love

I promise I'll be back with a more interesting post soon ;)

a donation

friends, from one blogger to the next, i encourage you to donate to this family. 

a blogger i follow regularly posted about her friend's family in need, and any small donation helps. 

there is a huge giveaway attached to it, as well!

here's the link!

love and merry christmas, back soon x